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I don’t like the term “positive thinking”, because of the meaning that most people assign to it. They think that all they should do is to think positively, but any change requires an action. You can’t go to your garden, which is full of weeds, and think, “There’s no weed, there’s no weed. My garden is ideally clean”. No! You should go there, see the weeds, face the situation, and say to yourself, “OK, I’m going to get rid of that goddamn weed right now!” I think it’s more like constructive thinking rather than positive thinking. Anyway, no matter the word you’re using, even if you understand the power and advantages of constructive thinking, in some situations it may be extremely difficult to practice it. When some really unpleasant things are happening in your life, you are rarely able to think positively or constructively. In order to master the skill of constructive thinking to the level when you can practice it in difficult situations, you have to train your mind in an extensive and profound manner. You should become the real ‘will-athlete’ to control your inner condition despite all the external situations. Training starts with the dissolution of destructive thinking patterns. But what are they?
7 Destructive Thinking Patterns
- ‘Unsubstantiated conclusive’ – you make conclusions without proper evidence
- ‘Never to me’ – you don’t believe that good things can happen to you
- ’The negative psychic’ – you think that people constantly think negative about you
- ‘Should, would, could’ – you know what you should do to change your life, but there’s always something that stands in your way
- ‘Emotion based’ – your emotions control your reality (e.g. “I feel that I can’t do it; therefore I can’t”)
- ‘It’s all my fault’ – you perceive yourself as the source of everything bad
- ‘They’re all wrong’ – you think that no one, except for you, can do things right
All of it is nonsense. Once you identify your negative patterns, you should change them. How?
Changing Destructive Thinking Patterns
- Recognize the problem
- Be aware when you use destructive thinking patterns – you can only change them when you notice their appearance; therefore you should increase your awareness
- Replace the bad with the good – old habits die hard, so have some patience. Changes won’t happen overnight. Depending on the power of your belief, it may take you from a week to a year to change a negative pattern. But don’t worry – with practice you will succeed
- Keep working everyday – spend some time daily to work on your thinking patterns. If you work episodically, the results will also be weak
- Change your life with your new way of thinking – once you are successful at changing your thought patterns, you will notice that your life starts to change right away
People can change, do change, and change for the rest of their lives. Just believe in yourself and take action.